I love how people judge me complain about my "ego" and yet they know nothing about my life or hat i have done, it just goes to show how ignorant people are, and how sensitive they have become, and how unrealistic they are about themselves, it only goes to show me how little people really know about themselves, and it makes me sad, because they aren't in control of their lives, and constantly blame other people for their problems, because the more you know yourself, the more you can love and forgive, and the less you judge others.

u

I find it amusing how easily people get upset, judgmental and abusive when you disagree with their opinion, or ask them questions, i've noticed people aren't interested in discussions or debates and very few are able to do so, they just want everyone to like and agree with what they say, but then then how can new ideas or a deeper understanding of an idea ever grow, i think people are just more interested in judging others and complaining about how bad their life is, or hard it is, either accept the truth and move on, or reject the lie and move on, or accept the situation or change it

change

The world wont change until people realize it is them who must change. people are easily aroused but very few follow that excitement with any action. Because its not easy to change yourself, you need to reflect on what you do and say, on a daily basis, you need to be aware of how you react and feel, how you treat other people, and not just your friends or family, but the people you work with, and strangers in the street. You need to be aware how you treat people differently, how you lie to yourself, and to those around you, and the information you share and what you hide from others. To become aware of your own feelings and not compromise yourself because others disagree with you. We also must stop believeing and accepting the mainstream media, is telling us, we ned to question more, and not always react in a haste.

An ode to my father, the only person i know that has loved me from the day i was born, he has always been a light, a guide for me, ive not always followed his lead, because at times ive allowed my ego to control my actions, ive been selfish, and arrogant, but no matter how much ive wronged him, how much ive hurt him, or others, he has always stood by me, side by side, he will always be the first person i pick for my team, ive yet to meet a man, as honest and kind as him, always ready to help others even when those, who have wronged him, and those who have slandered against him, i stand stronger today, not because of who i am, but because who my father was and is, a real, and a real father, there is no greater gift of blessing a child could receive than a real father.

lost

The problems we suffer today, are because we have lost our way, we have forgotten where we come from, and what connects us, we have left behind what united us, and now worship what destroys us, we don't know who we are, or why we are here, and we value systems like religion, politics and fame, which do nothing but divide and hold us back, we have come to value what is unimportant, because we have lost what is real.

chapter one

It was a cold night out, typical for this time of year, cold and wet, and if you were really lucky, windy. This tended to be more painful then the other two, which were just mild annoyances, especially for someone who’s lived their whole lives in this old, dirty city. The only places open at this time of the night or is it morning, I was never sure when that exchange was made, were derelict buildings or buildings of derelict behavior. My home from home was the local casino, when I wasn’t working or sleeping I was wasting my time and money on drinks and the occasional whore that was left over. The neon lights now became my bedtime light, without the bed. You could waste hours and days in here without knowing what was happening out there in the dark, or the day, the streets had grown to feed off anyone that would look them in the eye. I swear our own species will end up killing ourselves with the seven deadly sins before we know what’s going on, and we have nothing left but to decay into fossils, for another time to find us. I wonder who else can see it all happening right before their eyes, but still do nothing. I just sit here night after night throwing cash into chips and whiskey. Lucky or unlucky for me, I never win big, nor lose big, I generally break even each night, maybe because money never concerned me, probably why I’m never chasing that big win, that will make me rethink my whole life and quite playing while I’m ahead. “Thanks dear I’ll have another on the rocks. Hey did you get your hair down? You’re looking amazing tonight.” “Shut up, you’re always talking sweet but when are you going to take me out for dinner?” “Ha ha ha trust me it’s for own good, I’m no good for you.” “I think I’ll be the judge of who is good for me and who isn’t.” “Hmmmmm ok when I win big I’ll take you out to a movie and dinner, any where you want to go.” “Bhaaaa your so old fashioned aren’t you?” “It’s how I was bought up. Well I’m off to drain out the old whiskey to make room for that drink I’ve been waiting for, for the last 20 minutes.” “Yeah you’re real romantic aren’t you.” “I told you I’m no good for you.” After so long you get to know the local girls, they no longer look attractive, especially when they all try to act like your mother. I never got on with that women, so I’ll be damned if I let another one like her into my life. I knew this place like the back of my hand, I must of done this journey a million times, a million drunk, so I never needed help getting around the flashing lights and whizzing and banging that when on at all the machines and tables, as people won and lost their life savings. I always wondered if the guys in the offices that run this place ever cared about what happens to a husband, father, son, mother, grandmother that’s feeling lucky and decides to put down all the money he or she saved up for years only to lose all that work in 5 minutes. I guess you couldn’t run a place like that if thought the way I did. Opening the door, I caught the flash of a gun going off, and a guy all in black run past me with a briefcase, almost shoved me to the floor, maybe I’m not as drunk as I thought I was, took me a few seconds to realize what happened. Who the fuck took that iron? I ran back in and say a guy on the ground, a red pool was already surrounding his head, where did he get it, in the head? I saw him clutching his chest. “He got me in the fucking chest, that fucking motherfucking I’m gonna take you to hell with me, if I get up from this floor, you fuck, I’m not dying on a toilet floor, come on buddy don’t just stand there get me out of this shit fucking room.” “Look buddy if I move you it might get worse.” “If I’m fucking dead it’s not gonna be any worse is it. Just move me you fucking bitch” “Well if you’re dead what difference does it make if you’re in the toilet?” “Fuck you buddy, your fucking taking the piss aren’t you?” “Okay relax, let me try and pick you up.” He was really heavy almost as tall as me, but he was way bulkier, and couldn’t help at. “Ok that’s enough you need to stop the bleeding.” “Why did he shoot you, and what was in that briefcase?” “What the fuck are you a cop or what?” “Argh yeah, I’m a detective, but I’m on leave at the moment, so we can do this off the books, how’s that sound? I won’t tell anyone, if you wont.” “How the fuck can I trust you pig?” “Well buddy if you’re not dead in 5 minutes you will be on the way to the hospital and there you will be in even more danger, because I’m pretty sure if they find out where you are they will come and finish the job. And you won’t get any protection without my help” “Ok I will talk to you, but no one else, you need to help me, but I can’t tell you what’s in the case.” “Who was that guy that shot you?” “I don’t know his name, his code name should have been Zorro, and he was just supposed to drop off the cash and take the case, but he told me he didn’t have any money, so he said he was just going to kill me instead.” “How did he know to meet you here?’ “Usually my boss just sends word online, to their boss, and then at the end we buzz at the end, to make the final drop.” “Ok well your ride is here, you might actually survive, I’ll come round and see you later, I’ve got some work to do.” “You better not cheat me” “I don’t think you’re in a good position to be telling me what to do.” “Fuck you.” “Ok guys take care of him, I need him alive, at least for the next 48hrs. And make sure the blue put a couple on watch for him till I get back tonight, or tomorrow” “Hey what the fuck I’m not going anywhere soon.” “Yeah we’ll see” “Hey come on sir please just remain calm and lie down.” “I am fucking calm, I didn’t kill that pig did I, yet.” “The way you’re looking buddy, you’d be lucky to do anything right now.” As I watched them rush this guy off to his ride into heaven or hell, I knew he wasn’t being honest with me, and if I was to help him, id need help, and to take a trust nobody kinda liking to everyone I meet “Here’s your drink darling.” “Haaaa come on now, you know that kinda talk won’t get you anywhere with me.” “So what was the deal with that guy?” “I don’t know but I’m gonna find out soon enough.” I knew if I was going to find this guy I would need to get to a computer, and without my own details. “Hey Cuper you up aren’t ya?

awareness

change can only begin, when you become aware of yourself, the moment you begin to know yourself, your habits, and how your own mind works, only then can you ever find true happiness and peace, As a trained psychologist, id like to know to what extent awareness has to do with intelligence because im yet to find any study that includes it as a factor, and yet, ive found it to be so essential, why is that?

antikythera mechanism

http://www.nature.com/scientificamerican/journal/v301/n6/box/scientificamerican1209-76_BX1.html

pain, relief.

The rain began, the thunder clapped, The tears began, the door slammed She walked away, my heart stopped, The trees swayed, my dreams flashed, As the fear flowed in, I never thought it would be, A well I fell in, floating alone in a sea Learning to let go, relax your shoulders, Let them drop, bring it back to now, In, out, stop.

ur own pain

Because your ego is strong, and you are so unaware of its power, any thought or idea that differs from yours upsets you and you take it personally when it wasn't personal idea at all, ideas, thoughts, concepts are not you, especially when most of what you think doesn't come from you, but is just a product of your experiences and what people have told you, most of which you know is a lie,most of which you believe is a lie, but you are not aware of it, so you defend it and all, as though it is a representation of who you are and how you are and what you think, this is the basis of all anger, your own ego, anger can not exist without ego, and your happiness can not bloom when your ego is in control

education

Education can not simply be seen as a result of classroom action, nor can it be improved without looking at economic, cultural, religious and social norms, because its not just a matter of what is taught, but how, and how students respond. It's not just the responsibility of the teacher, but also the student, their family, society and government which will determine whether an education system is "good" or "bad". Until all parties take responsibility, not only will our children suffer, but so will our country and our futures.

god

ur a human being, when will u act like one, anytime you are angry, you are an animal, anytime you are jealous you are an animal, anytime you greedy you are an animal, anytime, you refuse to accept the truth you are an animal, so anytime you you say you believe in god, you are a liar, because anytime you are angry or jealous or greedy, you don't nor could ever know god, because those who have ever known god, never become angry, jealous or greedy, because these are only for the those who have never known the truth.

positive

http://unesdoc.unesco.org/images/0014/001492/149284e.pdf

life

In life you will always meet the same people, hear the same message, suffer the same pain until you learn the lesson that which your maker needs you to learn.

Korean education

The Koreans have achieved a remarkable feat: the country is 100 percent literate, and at the forefront of international comparative tests of achievement, including tests of critical thinking and analysis. But this success comes with a price: Students are under enormous, unrelenting pressure to perform. Talent is not a consideration — because the culture believes in hard work and diligence above all

new

a new year, lets see how this will go, another teacher goes, but not long left in the year,