Narcissistic traits

Thomas suggests that narcissists typically display most, sometimes all, of the following traits:

An obvious self-focus in interpersonal exchanges

Problems in sustaining satisfying relationships

A lack of psychological awareness (see insight in psychology and psychiatry, egosyntonic)

Difficulty with empathy

Problems distinguishing the self from others (see narcissism and boundaries)

Hypersensitivity to any insults or imagined insults (see criticism and narcissists, narcissistic rage and narcissistic injury)

Vulnerability to shame rather than guilt

Haughty body language

Flattery towards people who admire and affirm them

Detesting those who do not admire them

Using other people without considering the cost of doing so

Pretending to be more important than they really are

Bragging (subtly but persistently) and exaggerating their achievements

Claiming to be an "expert" at many things

Inability to view the world from the perspective of other people

Denial of remorse and gratitude





Hotchkiss' seven deadly sins of narcissismHotchkiss identified what she called the seven deadly sins of narcissism:

Shamelessness: Shame is the feeling that lurks beneath all unhealthy narcissism, and the inability to process shame in healthy ways.
Magical thinking: Narcissists see themselves as perfect using distortion and illusion known as magical thinking. They also use projection to dump shame onto others.


Arrogance: A narcissist who is feeling deflated may reinflate by diminishing, debasing, or degrading somebody else.


Envy: A narcissist may secure a sense of superiority in the face of another person's ability by using contempt to minimize the other person.


Entitlement: Narcissists hold unreasonable expectations of particularly favorable treatment and automatic compliance because they consider themselves special. Failure to comply is considered an attack on their superiority, and the perpetrator is considered an "awkward" or "difficult" person. Defiance of their will is a narcissistic injury that can trigger narcissistic rage.


Exploitation: Can take many forms but always involves the exploitation of others without regard for their feelings or interests. Often the other is in a subservient position where resistance would be difficult or even impossible. Sometimes the subservience is not so much real as assumed.


Bad boundaries: Narcissists do not recognize that they have boundaries and that others are separate and are not extensions of themselves. Others either exist to meet their needs or may as well not exist at all. Those who provide narcissistic supply to the narcissist are treated as if they are part of the narcissist and are expected to live up to those expectations. In the mind of a narcissist there is no boundary between self and other.

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