Friday, August 06, 2004

6 August 2004 8:17 PM

a moment before work once again, and rather tired with little sleep, and a little stuff to do, but this is the calm before the storm, and one should always be one with time, and take heed of the current moment, and just be, though not easy, but very beneficial, it seems that everything is bipolar, and of course cant exist otherwise, but if we were able to melt the east and west, north and south, then there would be one under heaven, a perfect ying yang, which would propel the this race a thousand times faster into the future, and would even allow the feeble use of our minds to become a lot more efficient and all encompassing, I’ve also realised two of the worst ever moments in an individuals life, one involves the first realization of one mortality, and the other involves the idea that one is not loved, the most amazing moment in ones life is the realization that one is loved, and to truly believe it, which isn’t just about the environment one is in, but wether one believes it is up to the individual, and one can only see the truth with thine third eye, in which meditation is the only way to uncover, and to also control and train the mind, so that we are not at its manipulation, as many people act first without analysis, the best one individual can do is to realize when and why an emotion has arisen, and catch it before we act so hastily, and the best way to minimize hatred, and racism, is get people of different cultures to mingle as much as possible, there they then see they are no different, and are after the same thing as they are, I also find my self enjoying more and more of everything, my tolerance is higher, my appreciation is higher, my mind is more open, this may be due to meditation, but unfortunately most of the aging population are travelling in the opposite direction, and are enjoying less and less, and still stick to the same music or movies that they grew up with which is such a real shame because there is so much art out there they miss, and who is anyone to judge, especially art, which is so subject, and meant to produce a reaction, the problem is most people don’t question it and just shut it out, how hard is it to ask one self why don’t I like, and the same works for the opposite, what is it about the art that I do like, why do I like it, I think, well for me art is about an expression of an emotion or emotions which an individual is trying to express the best, and often the only way they can, so how can people judge what they are feeling, and how the feel to express it, unless your just judging the art on practical, and technical areas but who does that any way, most people wouldn’t even know how to write a song, or paint a picture, which damn bloody hard, which is maybe also why i’m more appreciative of art in general because I am an artist and know how hard it is to find what it is exactly your trying to express, all forms have its place upon society, and certainly need to classified to protect those of an innocent age, but art needs to be pushing the boundaries, it there is also a need for the elite artists such tenors which are just gifted, is it really a talent when your born with it, isn’t a talent something you work at and perfect, if your born with it, its just to easy, I dunno maybe that’s just me, but how can you claim it, particularly when it comes to singers, its not as thou they had to do anything to gain such a voice, not like painters, musicians, or sculptors, to write a symphony like Beethoven, to create I think is the ultimate talent, that’s what it is in a nutshell I guess, such as painters who take a blank canvas, or sculptors who take a lump of rock, and turn it into art, these along with those who save lives and decreases the suffering of others should be heralded as the elite of society and should be famous, not actors what do they do for anyone, make a movie with money, I can do it in my backyard, but I could never save a dying being, I hope thou one day that thru other means that I can alleviate some suffering, of the mind, which I think is just as important, for I’ve had my battle in my time, and the worst of them where in my own damn head, there is nothing anyone has done in this world to harm as much as I have harmed myself, and what’s worse is the effect it has upon the people in my environment, I once thought I could get around without affecting anyone, and just glide over this world like a butterfly and no one would notice, but for better or worse, no one can, we are all in this together, and should support each other together, its so simple in theory, but if people didn’t have an ego, and weren’t so judgemental, it would be soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much easier to get along, if people just said what they felt, with no attachments, and people where able to take without judgment, if someone’s not smart then they can read more, or if I can do maths like my dad, it doesn’t mean you’re a bad person, it a bloody fact people don’t so egotistical and think that there putting you down, its not the end of the world if you a little overweight, not as smart as someone else, it just is, people are so hung up on being judge, who cares your not better or worse and where not the same, it would like a big tree putting shit on smaller tree, who the hell cares, just love one another, if every one had compassion and love for all beings, we would need bombs and guns, or police or even governments in there current form, just organisers, or leaders, and how can a country of 20million be run by just one, this is not logical, it would be good if we all had the same laws, and currency, there is so much segregation based upon whose on a piece of paper and what number it has on it, and what piece of dirt you were born, and what piece of dirt your enemy is born, your made from the same piece of clay as they say, if there was one all omnipresent being who created all these beings, do you really think that he would really want anything to die, or be killed, no way, for to create such life involves love and compassion, not a bloody jihad, or anything, even thou many wars and millions of people have died for their religion, not there god as they would want you to believe, a being that created the whole universe would love all under heaven as equal, irrelevant of the pigment of your skin, what a hoax.
There’s a beauty that resonates thru everything that is beyond the power of the pen, this is beauty, the same as truth, anything in its purest form cannot be expressed in any language, whether great feats of human endurance, or acts of terror,


“I don’t fear none of my enemies, and I don’t fear bullets from uzies, I’ve been dealing with something that’s worse than these, that make you fall to your knees, and that’s my anxiety’s, sane and the insane rivalry, paranoia has bout me to my knees, lord please please please take away my anxiety”
Black Eyed Peas


Made of dust and grim,
The red rust won’t cost you a dime,
Fall upon the ground from the sky,
With a son would you still lie?
What would you do if you knew the truth?
How could you take what you do?
You’re so concerned with yourself,
These blows only affect our wealth,
If you only could love a little more,
Through the light through the door,
Red is all you see,
Hate is all you will be,
To be free is the only way to live,
A tree can only grow from what you give,
So how do you expect to be right?
When you only have revenge in sight.

It can make you do some strange things,
Good and bad no one knows what it brings,
Nothing better than just lying by one side,
Naked in the mind nothing to hide,
There is nothing but to be,
If not blinded its easy to see,
What’s there what’s real?
Many get lost and unsure how they feel,
Afraid to be honest afraid to say,
Calm is best, calm wont betray,
It will never be until it’s lost,
Down upon a drain in the frost,
Arriving from the cold cold night,
And all you want to do is hold hold all night,
The answer is there shining in our face,
But too afraid to let go and feel the empty space,
Must melt away the ego and feel the truth
Hard in age remember your youth,



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